Shaarei Shamayim

Looking out at the congregation now, I am reminded of the words of Moses we read in the Torah last Shabbos (Deut. 30:1): Atem nitzavim hayom kulchem lifney Hashem Elokeychem, “You are standing today—all of you—before Hashem your Gd!” It’s Rosh Hashanah and we are here—well, not really standing at the moment, don’t worry, we’ll do plenty of that today—but we are here, before Gd.

This year all of us faced difficult challenges of sorts—some greater than others. One of my most difficult challenges this year was to send my youngest child away to college. Jonathan now goes to the University of Miami. It’s really hard to let go of our children and let them live their own lives. This reminds me of the story of a father who gets an email from his son at college. Since his son never sends an email and only calls when he needs money, with the worst premonition he opened the email and read the following letter from his boy:
Dear Dad: It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am—36! But it’s not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
Don’t worry Dad. I’m 20 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’m sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
Love, Your Son Aaron

Well the father shared the email with his wife and—as you can imagine—both were noticeable agitated. No, that’s not the right word…they went ballistic! They tried to call their son’s cell phone again and again, leaving voice mails and text messages, but no reply. Then a few hours later the father gets another email from his son:
Dear Dad: None of what I wrote in my previous email is true. I’m not in the woods in Stacy’s trailer—there is no Stacy! I’m in my dorm room at college. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a few bad grades that you will find when you go to my student page on the university web site next week when the semester ends!
I love you...Call me and let me know if it’s safe to come home for Chanukah during winter break!
Love, Your son Aaron

Yes we all faced challenges of sorts this year. Many of us had a really difficult year. And those of us who did not, are nevertheless very worried about what this New Year will bring. The sense of disappointment and loss is palpable. Many of us have seen our savings and retirement funds dwindle to half of what they used to be. Most have seen their business or practice shrink. Others have seen colleagues and friends lose their jobs. Some of you have lost your job and don’t know how you’re going to support the family. Some of you are now dealing with serious medical issues that you never dreamed would happen to you or to the people close to you.

And most devastatingly, many of us, in frustration, have given up on our dreams. So we come here today on Rosh Hashanah, standing before You Gd, begging You to help us. We pray: “Gd, make this New Year better!” Let’s all say it together with me, “Gd make this New Year better!” (3 times) Or at least, restore things to the way they used to be.

In that same Torah reading from last week, Moses (Deut. 30:2) offers us some advice: V’shavta ad Hashem Elokecha. When life is hard and difficult and you have been brought low, Moses implores us, Shavta, “Return unto Hashem your Gd!” But how do we do that? The word shavta, like Teshuva, means “to turn.” So if I read Moses correctly, what he is recommending to us is that if we just turn around in His direction, Gd will more than meet us half way.

This is illustrated by the classic Chassidic story of 2 Chassidim on a ladder. One was on the 4th rung and the other on the 12th rung. The Rebbe asks his students: “Which one is higher?”
They all responded, “Of course the one on the 12th rung.”
            “No min kinder,” he told them, “it depends on which way they are going! If you are going up, then you are higher.”They key is to be ascending, to be getting ever closer to Gd.

And not only that, Moses (Deut. 30:6) continues: umal Hashem Elokecha et l’vavcha, “And Hashem your Gd will circumcise your heart.” What does it mean to circumcise your heart? I think it refers to our spiritual barriers. Each of us, throughout our lives—for one reason or another—creates layers upon layers of barriers to Gd. Moses is telling us that if we just turn towards Gd, He will circumcise, He will remove those barriers.

Let me ask you. What are your barriers to drawing closer to Gd? Are you are so stuck in the material world that you can only believe in what you can see and hear? I would then ask you: Do you believe that love exists, even though you can’t hear it or see it? Perhaps you weren’t raised to have a personal relationship with Gd and you don’t know where to begin. Or perhaps you’re secretly angry at Gd because you don’t think you deserved to lose your job or to get sick or to see your pension wither. When, at times, you throw your hands up declaring out of frustration, “Life sucks!” do you freeze your heart at the same time?

By the way, Barbara Ribner once pointed out to me that a good exercise when you are in a financial crisis is to look at your money. I don’t care if it’s a penny or $100 bill. What does it say on every coin and every bill? “In Gd we trust!”

Just trust Gd and turn towards Him, Moses implores us, tell Him you would like to be closer to Him and He will help you remove your barriers to Him—one by one. And when we seek Gd with a sincere heart, the Torah then teaches, He will shower upon us blessing after blessing. And it comes in many different ways. For example…  

I was listening to the radio a couple of weeks ago while I was driving, and as I was flipping through the stations, I heard an interview on the Mike Gallagher show with a cab driver named Thomas Chapel that literally blew me away. I went online to learn more about the story and this is what I found:
Thomas was called to pick up a passenger named, Rita Van Loenen, in Gilbert Arizona. There was some miscommunication with the dispatcher and Thomas had trouble finding the location and was late. When he finally picked up Rita, she really chewed him out.
Over the next few weeks, he was assigned to pick her up quite frequently. Eventually Thomas figured out that these regular trips were for dialysis. Although they never spoke much, Thomas later said: “I seen she was so sick and I asked, ‘Anyone ever offer you a kidney?’ You see, I was in the shower, the good Lrd spoke to me and said, ‘Thomas give her a kidney.’”

You may laugh at someone hearing Gd in the shower, when all most of us ever hear is ourselves singing. But we can find Gd and perceive a message from Him anywhere—even in the shower!

Anyway, Rita explained that everyone in her family was tested and no one was a good match. Thomas then offered to give Rita a kidney if they were a match.
“We tested so closely we could have been siblings,” Thomas said. So this cab driver—who, it turns out, was really an engineer who lost his job—gave one of his kidneys to a woman who was practically a stranger who was never very friendly and who chewed him out for no reason! Thomas could have been bitter that he had to drive a cab to make a living and put up with the insults of his fares. But, instead his response to hardship was to draw closer to Gd and try to figure out why Gd had him doing what he was doing now—to figure out what is his mission in life now.
“I think he’s an angel,” said Rita. “He gave me the gift of life.”
Thomas said: “It has to be a miracle. It’s too much of a coincidence; too many things had to happen just right. That’s what the good Lrd wants. He told me to give her a kidney!”

It’s a great story, right? Well, as Paul Harvey, may he rest in peace used to say, let me tell you the rest of the story. Thomas had been divorced many years ago and his former wife relocated without telling him where she was, and so he lost all contact with his young daughter. His daughter—now and adult—saw him being interviewed on television, looked him up, called him and they reconciled!

Think about that. After losing his job of many years, he didn’t become bitter. His response was to draw closer to Gd and try to figure out what Gd wanted from him now—what was his new mission in life. He then selflessly sacrificed one of his vital organs to save the life of a stranger who had been somewhat hostile to him. But as a result, Gd showered him with blessing as he then reconnected with his long lost daughter. Wow!

Now you don’t have to donate one of your vital organs to draw closer to Gd. There are many opportunities for chesed that we encounter every day: from just being nice to the people who work for us in our homes and businesses to helping a neighbor who is ill to donating and volunteering to help in the shule or any worthy charitable organization.

In addition, as a Jew, you draw closer to Gd when you increase your involvement in Jewish life and its traditions. Pick a mitzvah or 2 that you have not kept so carefully this past year and make a commitment now, on Rosh Hashanah to correct that. Maybe you can build a Sukkah next week and eat all your meals in it with your family on Sukkot. A Sukkah is a fragile hut, not very well protected from the forces of nature. What’s the message? You can lose your home, Gd forbid, and still have what’s really important in life. And what’s that? Everything you can fit into a Sukkah: the people you love—your family, friends. 

Buy and etrog and lulav and bless them together every day of Sukkot with your family thanking Gd for your blessings. Increase your Torah learning with my Sunday morning class. This year’s topic is for everyone: “How to Connect With Gd Every Time You Pray.” Wouldn’t you want to be able to do that? Kasher your home this year, or if your home is kosher, resolve to be more careful when eating outside your home.

Whatever mitzvah you choose, remember, Gd has blessed us with the treasure of His Torah as His guide on how to come closer to Him. Don’t insult Gd by discarding it. Use it! Just turn to Gd, my friends, and He will help you to remove your barriers to Him and then shower blessings upon you!

As in any relationship, getting close is a 2-way street. As we receive, we must give. Rosh Hashanah is not only a time to ask Gd for what we wish for the New Year, but it is also a day when we contemplate what is it that Gd wants from us? The sages teach that, 1st and foremost, Gd wants our hearts—for us to appreciate His blessings and to love Him. He desires that we act justly, love kindness and show compassion to others as He does to us. He demands that we live up to our end of the covenant, that we observe His commandments and sanctify His Holy Days and isn’t that why you are here?

He also wishes that each and every one of us realizes that each of us is a special unique individual whom He loves and not just a faceless number in a world of billions. So don’t become discouraged. Don’t give in to despair. You can turn things around in your life. Perhaps the biggest calamity of this past year was that because life has been so difficult, many of us have given up on our dreams as so many of our dreams were left unfulfilled. It’s a New Year. Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are days of dreams. So let’s start dreaming again today!

How do we respond to unfulfilled dreams? Rabbi Avi Weiss points out that in the Avoda section of the Musaf service on Yom Kippur, we recall the worship of the High Priest on Yom Kippur, like a hoped for dream for the day when the Temple will be rebuilt and the High Priest will again perform this service for us. However, the Avoda section is followed by a dream that goes awry—the Martyrology, the suffering of the 10 great scholars who were martyred at the hands of the Romans. The dream is shattered. There’s death and darkness and oblivion. So how do we understand this juxtaposition? How do we understand and deal with our dreams that have gone awry?

The key is to recognize that there is a difference between dream and reality. A dream is the hope of a glorious, almost perfect future. Reality, by definition, includes disappointments. But the challenge is—as disappointment sets in—never to forget the dream. Once you forget the dream it’s all over because you won’t be able to handle the reality. The story of the 10 Martyrs in our High Holy Day prayer book is in the shadow of the account of the High Priest to teach us that only by keeping our dreams alive can we be able to survive the difficulties.

The modern State of Israel is a dream: Reyshit tzmichat g’ulateynu, “The beginning of the dawn of our redemption,” as we say in our prayers. After 2,000 years we have returned to the Holy Land. But when we go to Israel, we face the reality of terrorism and a stifling bureaucracy and corruption in government. When we get on a bus or wait on line, people are a bit too pushy. But with all of its problems, Israel is a great country…as long as we keep the dream in place.

Dr. Gabe Loran, a linguist and Christian professor of religion, points out the difference between the terms “America” and the “United States.” “America” is the vision; it’s the mission; it’s the dream. The “United States,” that’s a country with all of its problems—drugs, crime, partisan politics. “America” is invincible, but the “United States,” as we saw on 9/11 is vulnerable. Notwithstanding the reality of the “United States,” the United States will make it as long as we don’t forget the dream of America. That is why I believe you won’t find in any of the patriotic songs of post 9/11 the words, “United States”—only “America!”

It’s the same with our lives. There are peaks, and—as we have unfortunately learned all too well this year—there are also valleys. Built into our lives are disappointments. We see it in our businesses, our marriages and our health. There are good times and there are bad times. But we will make it if…we keep dreaming. Yes, life has its challenges. It’s built in. But the High Holy Day liturgy teaches us how to respond to unfulfilled dreams. How do you respond? Keep dreaming! You may have to tweak the dream, but keep dreaming because if you stop dreaming, you stop living. 

2 years ago on Rosh Hashanah I challenged you to envision your dreams being fulfilled. I think the events of this past year dictate that we need to do it again. We must not give in to despair—to the thought that, “My dreams will never work out.” No matter how impossible it looks, we must never give up on our dreams. As the Talmud teaches (Makot 10b): B’derech sheh-adam rotzeh leyleych, ba molichin oto, “In the direction a person wants to go, Gd will lead him.” Gd will bring your dreams to completion.     

Some of us today—myself included—need to get a new fire ignited within us. We’ve worked so hard for 5 years to have success with our new shule building. Many of us have become discouraged. There have been times when some of us have just about given up. But if we show faith and don’t give up now when things are not going as we planned, Gd will make it happen—in one way or another.

In our personal lives, how many of us have given up on a dream? How many of us have given up on a child? Maybe you’re tempted to give up on the thought that you could achieve financial success. You need to draw that line in the sand and say: “Today is a new day, a New Year! I’m going to go out each day this year believing and expecting that every promise Gd put in my heart will come to pass.”

You may have a dream to get married. It’s been a long time. You’ve been through other relationships that didn’t work out. You’re tempted to think, “Well, I guess this is just not for me. I don’t think I’ll ever meet anybody.” You’ve got to keep your hopes up. Gd still has someone great He wants to bring into your life.

Sometimes life tests us, trying to get us to give up. It didn’t work out. You didn’t get that promotion. You didn’t qualify for the new home. It’s never going to happen. Just forget it! Time, on the other end, is pulling. It’s been so long. And we hear all the negative voices: “You don’t have what it takes;” “the doctor’s report says you’re not going to make it.” But if you’re going to fulfill your destiny you must have the attitude that nothing is going to cause me to give up.

We see it in the Torah portions for Rosh Hashanah. Abraham was promised by Gd (Gen. 15:4): Ki im asher yeytzei mimeyecha, hu yirashecha, “Only him that shall come forth from within you shall inherit you.” He then waited 20 years to see his promise fulfilled. I’m sure there were many mornings he thought, “I must not have heard Gd right. It’s never going to happen. Besides Sarah and I are too old to have a child.” But he shook off his doubt and never gave up. That’s what the Torah means when it says (Gen. 15:6): V’he-emin baHashem, vayach-sh’vecha lo tzedaka, “And [Abraham] believed in Gd and praised His righteousness that Gd will keep His promises.” (following the Ramban)

The only thing that can block the dreams Gd puts in us, teaches Rebbe Nachman, is our negativity—when we quit believing that it’s going to happen. It may seem impossible—like Abraham and Sarah having a child in their old age—but Gd can make a way even when it looks like there is no way! [Repeat]

Rosh Hashanah, according to the Talmud (Rosh Hashanah 10b), is not the time to confess our sins—that’s for Yom Kippur. Rosh Hashanah is a time to express our aspirations. It’s a time to believe in ourselves again—something that is ironically far more challenging for many than believing in Gd. It’s a time to envision what our lives would be like if the desires or our hearts came to fruition. So today on Rosh Hashanah, I challenge you to envision anew your aspirations. The child you’re praying for…see her life turned around. The troubled relationships you’re experiencing…see it turned around. The business that’s slow right now…see it successful.

You might say, “I don’t know if this will happen for me. I’ve had a lot of setbacks. I didn’t get the promotion I wanted last year. The doctor told me he didn’t know if I’d make it.” No, it’s not going to happen with that kind of attitude. It’s not over until Gd says it’s over! It doesn’t matter how long it’s been or how many obstacles you’ve had, Gd finishes what He started in you. 

I’m asking you today, on Rosh Hashanah to make a deal with Gd. Believe that—despite the current economy—your best days are still in front of you. Expect good things. Too often we settle saying, “Gd I once believed that you wanted me to prosper. But I get so frustrated at times. I’ll just find a way to live with things the way they are.” Now I realize that we need to be content, but Rosh Hashanah implores us, don’t settle for the way we are. Don’t give up on what Gd has put in your heart.

Abraham could have said, “Gd we have this other child, Ishmael, by our servant Hagar. It’s not exactly what you’ve promised, but it’s OK. We love him. He’s a son too.” Or, “Gd, I really wanted to get married but I’m getting kind of old, I guess I’ll just settle for being single. Nothing wrong with that.” No, keep that dream alive! Believe that Gd will finish what He started in you, and at the right time, He’ll bring that perfect person into your life.”

Some of you, at one time believed you could overcome that addiction, but now it’s been so long you got comfortable where you are. Gd says, “Begin again!” Some of you wanted to buy a new home, but you didn’t qualify. That was 5 years ago when the market was high. Gd says, “Begin again!” Gd is saying, “It’s not over until I say it’s over. Begin again.” Get a new vision for your dreams on Rosh Hashanah, urges the Talmud.

So, as a congregation, let’s follow the Talmud’s advice now. I want everyone here to close their eyes. Take a couple of deep breathes, and with each breath feel more and more relaxed. [Pause] Let’s see into the future to next Rosh Hashanah. Imagine sitting in our new shule with all your loved ones bathed in Gd’s light, singing praises of thanksgiving to Gd for bringing us into our new shule. See what it looks like and how wonderful it feels to be there together...
Now think about all your hopes and dreams for this New Year. See your dreams completed in front of you. What does it look like? How does it feel? Imagine yourself thanking Gd next year in our new shule for fulfilling your dreams this year…[Pause] Open your eyes.

We close our prayers on Rosh Hashanah morning with the prayer, Hayom. Hayom means “today.” We sing:
Hayom t’amtzeynu, “Today Gd, strengthen us.
Hayom t’varcheynu, “Today Gd, bless us.”
Hayom tishma shavateynu, “Today Gd, hear our cries.” Hayom t’kabeyl b’rachamim uvratzon et t’filateynu, “Today Gd, accept our prayers with compassion and will them to be!”

So let’s sing this prayer at the close of the service today with renewed gusto, and—as we leave the shule—let’s go out with renewed determination and expectancy. Let’s keep in our hearts the words of Psalm 27 from our prayers this season: Kavey el Hashem, chazak v’ameytz libecha, v’kavey el Hashem, “Hope in Gd; strengthen yourself and He will give you courage to go on; hope in Hashem!” Amen!