Shaarei Shamayim

When was the last time you had a conversation with Gd? For some of you that may seem like a strange question because for some of you, speaking to Gd occurs mostly or only in the construct of a formal prayer service.

Rabbi Levi Meier, a clinical psychologist and hospital chaplain in Los Angeles, in his book, Ancient Secrets: Using Stories of the Bible To Improve Our Everyday Lives, writes of a hospital patient who had never prayed: “He had thought of prayer as a recitation of a lot of memorized verses; he had thought praying as a form of begging. He did not know—because he had never been taught—that praying is talking to Gd.”

Rabbi Meier writes of another patient, a lady who asked him: “Why am I suffering?”
            “Ask Gd,” he suggested. “Include this question in your prayers.”
            She seemed surprised at the suggestion and challenged him: “But will I actually hear Gd’s answer?”

He then writes: “When I explained to her that of course she would hear the answer—with her inner ear—she stared at me in disbelief. Although she had prayed all her life, the idea that prayer was a dialogue—not a monologue—was foreign to her.”

The central character of today’s parsha—Isaac—was not the 1st person to dialogue with G-d—that was Adam. But he was the 1st person to conceive of prayer as a conversation.

Abraham had sent his trusted servant, Eliezer, to find a wife for his son Isaac back in Haran where his family lived. Miraculously, he encounters Rebecca at the local well and is very impressed with her kindness and generous spirit. When he finds out that she is Abraham’s niece, he’s elated and proceeds to negotiate with the family for her betrothal to Isaac. After long negotiations with her brother Laban, Eliezer returns to Canaan with Rebecca as a wife for Isaac.

As the returning entourage approaches, the Torah (Gen. 24:63) records: Vayeytzey Yitzchak lasu-ach basadeh lifnot arev, vayisa eynav vayaar, v’hiney g’malim ba-im, “Isaac went out to converse in the field towards evening and he raised his eyes and saw—and behold—camels were coming.” Isaac had gone out, lasu-ach basadeh, “to converse in the field.” Who was he conversing with? The Talmud and Midrash, based on a clearer use of this word in Psalms, teach that it means, “to converse with Gd.” And so the Talmud concludes that from here that it was Isaac that instituted the Mincha afternoon prayer service with his conversation with Gd in the afternoon towards evening. Having a conversation with Gd, since then, has been a paradigm of prayer.

Rabbi J. J. Schacter of Yeshiva University writes of a more contemporary example of this mode of prayer:
            A friend of mine was davening at the Western Wall during a recent trip to Israel when a blind Sephardi man slowly made his way to the front of the Wall. He put down his stick and slowly caressed its stones, lovingly running his hands over them. After about 2 minutes, he recited a few chapters from Psalms and then began to speak to G-d.
            “Ribono shel Olam [Master of the World], I have not had the opportunity to be here for a few weeks so I need to bring You up to date about my life and my family. You remember I told You about my son who was getting ready to go into the army? Well, he started about 10 days ago. I don't know where he is, but You surely do. Please watch out for him. And then, of course, You remember my daughter. I mentioned to You that the last time we spoke that she was ready for a shiddukh [a husband]. In fact, she started dating and she is finding it much more difficult than she thought it would be. Please help her. And then, my 3rd child…”
            By this time, my friend was feeling uncomfortable eavesdropping on what was obviously a private conversation, but he was mesmerized by the obvious closeness this man felt for Gd. He had never heard someone speak to Gd in such a real, direct and unselfconscious way. After another minute he could not help hearing him say, “And about my youngest child…Oh I’m so sorry, I don’t mean to take up Your time. I just remembered that I told You everything about him the last time.”
            And when I heard the story, Rabbi Schacter writes, I thought to myself, does one have to be blind to see Gd in such a direct way?

The followers of Rebbe Nachman—many of whom are Bratzlav Chasidim, but many others are more modern—set aside 10 minutes or so every day to talk to Gd. It’s called hisbodedus, literarily meaning, “being alone with Gd.” These are not formal prayers sessions. In fact, no prayer book is opened. A person just speaks his personal thoughts—distressed, joyous, whatever—to Gd every day. It can be done at anytime. But for the most pious, a great time for this is midnight or later. Midnight is calculated as 6 hours after the appearance of the stars which last night was 12:02am. What was important was the effort of going to sleep and waking up to converse with Gd. But anytime you do it, it can be a truly awesome experience—especially if it’s done regularly.

Question: If Gd is to be conversed with in this informal manner, why do we need formal prayer? Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik, during one of his noted Saturday night public lectures taught:
            Formal prayer in Judaism is an ethical gesture. The essential Jewish prayer is the Shemoneh Esrei, “The 18 Blessings,” [the Amida]. All the blessings are formulated in the plural. As Jews praise, petition or thank Gd, they do so on behalf of the entire community. For example, one does not ask Gd to heal one’s illness and pains; one asks Gd to heal everyone. “Heal us,” not, “heal me,” is the formulation. So it goes for the entire 18 Blessings.

If this is a conversation with Gd, it’s depersonalized to some extent. Someone in existential straits, be he ill, depressed, impoverished or insulted, will certainly not feel the same sense of closeness to Gd by praying for everyone as he will by praying for his own pain. Rabbi Soloveitchik observed: The tremendous obligation that the community imposes on each Jew who prays, in the plural, does not exclude personal conversation with Gd. As follows: The end of the 18 Blessings [of the Amida] is not its end. A few lines of prayer have been added on. If the 18 Blessings were sufficient, no more prayers would be needed. The additional prayers are in the singular. The individual, qua individual, must also converse with Gd.

The Talmud (Mishnah Berachot 4:4) suggests that along with the formal prayers of the Amida, we should add our own personal prayers. After praying for Gd to heal the sick, say a personal prayer for those you love and/or for yourself that may be ill. When you say the prayer for sustenance, add a personal prayer for your livelihood. Rabbi Soloveitchik points out that there is a personal verse added before we begin the Amida and one added at the end. The verse before is from Psalm 51, “My Lrd, open my lips that my mouth may speak Your praise,” and the one at the end from Psalm 19: “May the expressions of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart find favor before You, Lrd, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

And so these verses form an Amida sandwich—of sorts—of connection and conversation with Gd on behalf of the community and on behalf of the individual. Built into the structure of formal prayer is a time for conversation with Gd—with plain, simple talk. Besides my prayers for the community, there is a place for me—in every prayer—to talk to Gd.

So let me ask the question I began with: When was the last time you had a conversation with Gd? We will now recite the Musaf Amida. This Amida can be difficult for many to relate to with its remembrance of the Sabbath sacrifices in the Temple of old and its theme of delighting in Shabbos rest. There is, of course as in every Amida, a prayer at the end offering Thanks to Gd and a prayer for peace. Everyone can certainly find dialogue with Gd to offer in those prayers. But even in the prayer mentioning the Sabbath sacrifices we can offer our own asking Gd to give us strength in sacrificing some of what we have in order to accomplish more. And when we mention the delight of Sabbath rest we can ask Gd to give us a Shabbos respite from the stresses and pressures in our lives.  

So again, when was the last time you had a conversation with Gd? As we now rise to pray the Musaf Amida, hopefully you can say it was today! Amen!

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